I had fun taking time off from the blog. I wonder, do I want to keep doing this with little reward?.. I do enjoy the process of creation, but the whole deal of photographing, posting, and waiting for a chance to be heard really does drain me at times.
I like making art, writing poetry, and writing little articles, among other things. But the idea of sitting in front of a computer screen all day, every day is starting to get a bit cumbersome and time consuming.
I liked being able to have time to think more, and to be able to clean out the house more and list things on eBay. To actually make some money was a nice change. I put so much work and effort into the blog when I blog regularly and I get very little reward. I question whether it is really worth the effort.
A part of me wants to just quit the blog altogether and work on fixing the house up and developing my projects to completion without all the blogging on top of it. Really, why do I do it?
I question my motives.
The spring is pretty much here for me. Yesterday, it was somewhere near, or in the 80 degree (F) mark. I love to sit outside during the spring. It is nice to get fresh air and to have a place to ‘tune in’ and heal. But if I am in the house all day praying and hoping to get noticed on the Internet, I am not able to enjoy life.
I like the work I am doing. I like making comic strips and sharing the work, but I get very little in return and I need time to devote to building up my wealth in other ways. I don’t want to be begging or trying to convince people to buy something that may not be worth it for them.
I need time to spend on the projects, but that can’t be all I do. Most likely I will blog very sparingly for a while and take more time to fix the house up this year. The house needs so much work still, and I can’t do it while blogging every day. Really, it needs a lot of TLC.
After doing this blog stuff for many years, I am getting to a point where it really is not worth the effort. I don’t blame anyone. I need to stop distracting myself from life. I need to live a little and get out more. I can’t push myself to do things in the physical if it is all in my head on the Internet.
I need time to develop projects that are too numerous to list. I have started over 20 projects and I just need time to develop them without the added feeling of being watched by over 1000 people, not that any of you are really in my face, or watching me in a bad way.
That is what I am thinking now. I tend to change directions or opinions from one day to the next. One day I will want to do one thing, and the next the opposite. I am realizing that this blog has too many topics for people to really enjoy it as a blog. I feel that the best blogs stick to one topic and expand on just one thing in particular. Here, I have my abstracts, my angel art, and poetry and other writing and photography- too many to think about when one person wants one thing and another the other.
If I do blog regularly again, it will be on one topic mostly. I have toyed with starting several blogs, one for each topic, but that would be confusing for me and I don’t know which topics to focus on. Maybe I will blog tomorrow, maybe I will disappear from Internet land in order to finish projects. It would be nice to have things to sell and to have things done. I think I just need some more mental space in order to allow things to finish.
Thanks to any longtime followers and friends. Thanks to newcomers and fans. I do appreciate it. I am still trying to figure out what to do, but that is where I am now.
Tim Edwin B.